We all have an Impactful Destiny

Something that is common amongst humans is that we feel we are here for something. Our life has purpose, we know deep down we aren’t here to just flip burgers and waltz our thumbs on our screen. Our life has meaning. We have a destiny. But many of us say ‘I don’t know what it is’. I think we do know what it is, we are just terrified to admit it. Because if we know it then we have to do something about it.

But there is a problem…

Admitting it, we face it. We face it everyday when we aren’t doing what we were born to do. It makes us feel shitty, it makes us feel guilty.

And the problem is…

Our mind.

Everything is possible. But our mind doesn’t let us believe that. It blocks us, sidetracks us, makes us play small. It is very good at deceiving us and making us think we are safe. ‘Don’t you dare do what you are thinking because of x,y,z’. The problem is that if you don’t do it you are preventing your own growth, your own destiny. ONLY YOU can do what you came on this Earth-plane to do, no one else can do it. You are unique and your destiny is unique. Yet, I see soooooooooo many people letting their mind get in the way, stopping them from really having what they truly desire.

Your destiny doesn’t have to relate to work, it can relate to having a family, living somewhere else, writing a book, being a great partner, enlightenment you name it. I don’t want to box you into thinking this destiny= purpose = money. No, that’s a 21 century way of thinking and we are human beings first and foremost before being a ‘money producing machine’.

I see so many dreams die because of a lack of commitment but also because people are scared of themselves. They are terrified of what they could do and so they never do it. What did the ‘little you’ dream of doing in life before you let others peoples beliefs invade your mind? At the end of your life, what will you be content with? Will you be happy with the way you lived? When there is nothing to care about at the end of the day because you are leaving this Earth will you be satisfied with what you did and how you did it? I find reflecting on death helps to put things in perspective. Because death will creep up on us, it is there. We cannot pretend it doesn’t exist.

So as the age old saying goes- the riches place is in the graveyard. I tempt you to make this a false statement. I tempt you to finally write that book, move to someplace you love, do that art project, make music, carve a statue, make a bubblegum castle, marry your best friend whatever, you name it.

The world is yours if you grab it by the balls with no mercy and don’t let go.

Not even when your mind tells you how far you have to fall. Commit to yourself.

If you want to heal and deal with your belief patterns that are holding you back. Contact me and I can help ‚̧

I wrote a book check it out.


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Opening the Heart

Being disconnected from the heart’s energy, is one of the hardest things I have ever had to overcome. Feeling numb, disconnected, stressed, anxious, unsure of how you feel about this and feeling nothing at all. It’s as though one just walks through life, unaffected and zombie-like. Not really feeling or taking anything in, ones passion’s create no more zest. It’s looking alive, but being dead inside.

I struggled with this for numerous years after betrayal and trauma left my heart closed. I didn’t want to feel, I didn’t want to go there. It was easier to live life at that time being shut off. But then, at some point, I needed to feel again because not feeling got worst than feeling the pain. I became so uncomfortable with the suffering I was repressing. I thought I was safe this way. When really, I was still getting hurt by things, but I was numb, what a paradox. What I was really blocking out was joy, love, happiness, peace! I was numb to all that good! Isn’t that crazy. My heart was blocked, but what it blocked off was all of life’s good stuff.

I did everything I possibly could, you name it; affirmations, ayahuasca, vision quests, meditation, yoga, shamanism, counselling, coaching, herbs, crystals, Ayurvedic practices, exercises, flower essences, breath work, honopono etc.

Everything worked, if even just a little. I won’t tell you there is ONE magic cure that will blast your heart open and you will feel happy and wonderful again. No, it takes intention and dedication. It takes courage to face the pain, the emotions that made you shut down, and the trauma that hurt you. It takes authentic self reflection, self forgiveness, and self acceptance to say you did your best and that is okay, you may not be perfect but that is okay, what happened to you may not be ok, but you are ok. And maybe you aren’t even okay right now, but you will be okay at some point in the future. Your life may not be perfect, but after all of that, you are still ENOUGH! No matter what you are enough. And you are still okay. You made it, you are a surviver and you are a badass spiritual warrior.

There is no magic cure to anything (I believe). It is an accumulation of many things.

How to start the healing process?

Your intention is important. Starting with intention is a great start. It is stating what you want to happen, with your power behind it. It is creating a force field into the universe. When you make a strong commitment you bend energy to your will.

Then listening to the universe, paying attention to signs. People you keep hearing about, or feel drawn to, places, things you feel a pull, a draw too. Explore it! You never know where it may lead.

Opening the heart after trauma, a break up, betrayal etc can be tricky because the body remembers the pain and wants to protect itself. It may open for a short time and then shut back down again. This happened to me, what feels like a hundred times. What I can say for this is that it takes patience. It will happen, maybe not right away but trust that. Maybe you are learning something, maybe there is more to uncover and maybe you just aren’t ready yet. And, that is okay. Everything takes its own time. The apple falls when it is ripe. Your heart will open in due time. You will trust in yourself again in due time. Be patient, I know it’s not easy but there are greater things at work than what we are aware of. The first step to healing is saying you are ready.

I know there is lots of tips and how to’s on the internet to open your heart and just so you are not disappointed here is some ūüėõ

My book ‘Rise in Love’ is available on amazon, it has exercises and goes more into depth with love, self love and relationships and healing work. If you are interested you can take a look, it is also sold in Vancouver at Yoga West (kits). I also offer coaching/ healing/energy work services if you are interested in working with me and feel ready but need support with your healing journey.

LOVE

Thalita

What’s with all the F***ing Happy People?

So many spiritual people emphasize gratitude, I know myself as well have endorsed it. Like a great commercial with sunsets and flying birds and little children skipping and singing and a woman says ” I am so grateful for …. it makes me feel wonderful and I can enjoy everything life has to offer, blah blah blah.” Just like the many prescription drugs available, we can have whatever ¬†reality we want based on a concoction¬†of chemicals. We can buy whatever we want, thinking it will give us happiness, but its as fleeting as a chocolate bar. One minute its there, ¬†next minute we ate it. Gone, forever. Anyways, I don’t want to get too emotional or carried away with my happiness affair with chocolate, we have some important things to cover. Here we go!

5017b02967349f20897b69f47b5de287¬†Gratitude is a beautiful emotion but for some its very eluding.¬†When down in the dumps, depressed or just plain enraged with life, its pretty damn hard to feel gratitude. Why is that? Well, we cant see what we don’t feel. The darker emotions tend to carry a heavy frequency, which also means its harder to move out of it, and harder to see truth through it. ¬†Its like swimming in water, your in it, until you get out and even then your still soaking wet. It takes a while for it to dry off. Once the darker emotions pass then we can feel lighter and brighter. However, because its lighter it means it can easily be missed, its very subtle and it needs awareness to be maintained. Thats why if something bad happens its easier to get in the dumps than to maintain the happiness. Why am I telling you this? Because, by knowing that different emotions carry different frequencies we can focus on creating awareness and paying attention to the more subtle energies in life. As we do this, we cultivate peace, happiness and joy. Which are all higher frequencies. Gratitude is also an expression of a very high frequency and it is when we feel connected to life around us. It is when we actually SEE life.

I went to watch the sunrise this morning and as I was staring out to the ocean and watching the sun come up, I had an insight. I have heard the saying many times before and its funny how we can hear it, and even say it but until we have that ‘Aha’ moment its really just shallow. As I was having my own mini commercial about how great life was, I realized that ‘ everything is a gift’. It all comes from the Divine Mother, and like a mother she cares for us deeply. She gives us everything relentlessly. She loves us!! SOOO Freaking much. She is the mother that cant wait for your phone call. She is the mother that sends you money when you totally messed up. She is the mother that will give you whatever you want because she wants to see you happy. She sacrifices herself for you.

You are her life, blood and bones. You are made of her and she cherishes you. You are here because of her. This life is truly a gift and as quickly as it was given, it can be taken away. All of it. Nothing is yours. Everything was given to you. For a short time on earth, your body is yours, your house may be yours, your clothes is yours. But it can be stolen, it can be lost, it can be taken. Nothing is yours and that is the illusion. 

Our unhappiness comes from attachments to nouns; people, places and things. We think because we have paid with something it is ours. But we are never satisfied. We are empty. When we buy something for ourselves, its good. But when someone gives us something as a gift. We cherish is, we keep it for years even if we don’t like it.. like an ugly sweater. But because it was a gift we give it more meaning, it becomes significant. It became a material symbol of the heart, its significance becomes deeper than face value.¬†3b2444b38c5efac72da00fc1c22f7b67

We get so attached to our things, to our people, to our friends, to our family. But we forget, they are not ours. In addition to them not being ours, they are a gift and when we stop seeing them as a gift, we lose gratitude, we loose appreciation. How many times are you present with the people you love? How many times do you act with them as though this is possibly the last time you will ever see them? Not much… usually we are so caught up in our own shit that we do not even realize we are not here. We are not giving each other our greatest gift, our presence. This is how we form regret. Because, people are a gift and they will not alway be around. One day, the Great Mother will take them back and we will be left with our memories. But will they be full ? Or Empty?¬†e71a9bad1abcdb028997f63071046598

I urge you to feel life in a different way. To really see life as a gift, because we are only borrowing. We are only having a brief experience of human existence and it is fleeting.

Tell your family you love them, kiss that person you love with all of the feeling in your bones. Take a breath as though it was your last, savour it. Walk on the earth with eyes open that this is what I am made up of, all the food I eat comes from here and to here I will return. And reflect on the age old saying “money can’t buy happiness”. Because life is the ultimate gift and it was given to you, not bought.

Cherish every moment, it is so precious, it is a gift.

 

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5 Ways to Have Effective Communication

Great teachers and¬†great leaders all have something in common they know how to communicate. ¬†The way to progress in society, relationships and personal life all happens through effective communication.Whether it be how we communicate with our souls to how we communicate with others. Verbal and non verbal communication is important for our success, to be understood and to move forward with our goals and objectives. If we can’t communicate, we can’t express.

It is for this reason I am writing this post; to share methods of communication that have helped me through conflicts and in day to day life.

1) Listen: 

To effectively communicate you have to listen, not just hear. Often we are distracted by what we will say in response that we do not even take into account what the other person is trying to express. We are reacting before we can even know the situation. Thereby, stop, listen. Be present! Give the person you are with your full attention. There is nothing more distracting than a person who is checking their phone, or is thinking about something else. Put everything aside and give the person who is speaking your undivided attention; it will save you time and it will make them feel heard.

2) Empathize: 

Feel the feelings the other person is trying to convey but do not take them on. Take their perspective and acknowledge that their feelings are real and justified. Just because you don’t agree, doesn’t mean they are wrong. It is the other persons experience and it has as much value as yours. Be open minded and see where it leads you. Take a walk in their shoes and feel how it feels to be them.

3) Be personal and Be open:

To communicate effectively it has to be authentic and it is through sharing, being open and vulnerable that is comes across that you care. Even if you are a private person, use your discretion, but be open. People need to feel you are ‘real’ and are coming from your heart not just trying to be a certain image or present a persona. Show you care and be aware.

4) Leave Out All the Circle Language:

Don’t dance around with what you are trying to say. Be courageous. Say it! If you can’t be truthful than you are living a lie. If you want to create a life you want than you gotta ask for it. ¬†Drop the ums.. the likes… the avoiding language. Be direct and be clear. If you want to have someone understand what you are saying, be specific. Be kind and caring in your language¬†but don’t dance around the truth.¬†Be honest! I cannot stress this enough. Tell the other person how you feel from your heart. Lying, or disguising your feelings will not heal the root of the issue. Being unclear or dishonest will only cause more issues down the road.

5) Keep the Communication flowing:

When you don’t want to talk is when you need to the most. We all have had situations in relationships and in business life of wanting to avoid and hide from another person because of a disagreement or just not feeling understood by another person. As much as we don’t want to talk to the other person in these situations it is when we need to talk the most. If it is left too long it can lead to resentment.

The way to get through the communication blocks is to talk it out. ¬†Don’t block yourself off and get defensive, stay conscious and aware and keep yourself open to allow communication to be effective. Be honest, be clear, listen and then explain how you feel. By opening the energy flow then one is able to dive deeper in communication and create a stronger relationship. When both parties know how the other feels than there is no mystery, it is transparent and it allows trust to be built.

Ready to POP- High Stress? Solution.

Many times we do not realize how and why we are unhappy. We are running from ourselves to avoid pain either through craving or aversion. We are trying to constantly become, instead of be. It is the present moment, when we merge with what we are doing that we free ourselves from stress and anxiety. Why learning how nature works, the Ocean etc we can know how to act. By riding out the good and bad times and being in our centre through it, we come to enlightenment.

What do you do? What are you going to be?

Achieve, Achieve, Achieve

Chase after success, success, success…

Until your adrenals are maxed out and you don’t know if you are coming or going,

Sending text messages, responding from this device to that device,

Getting headaches, forgetting appointments, forgetting your even breathing…

Why?

Why are we pushing ourselves to the point of exhaustion? Why are we forcing ourselves to try so hard? Why are we always living in the future?

As though we are not already enough…

9dc6839edd264b04f21a8a458cad4ba5ENERGY FOLLOWS THE LEAST PATH OF RESISTANCE, it is a universal law.. then why are we creating resistance within ourselves, making life in general more difficult because we are trying, rather than allowing, surrendering, and flowing.

The best surfers and dancers feel the rhythm, the pulsation of the wave, they move with it, merge with it and be it. They don’t BECOME anything, they are it..

So perhaps, we need to STOP, breathe, and take a moment. Be with the moment instead of forcing our will upon it.

All that tension in our muscles is us not being cool with whats happening. Let it go, stop holding on so tightly, use that breath to soften you, to cleanse you. 

Inhale deeply into the abdomen, exhale…. Inhale, go to the area of tension, exhale…. REPEAT.¬†

All stress and anxiety is a pressure on the self, whereas, when you are sincerely passionate and doing it out of love you are free in the activity, you are the activity.

Success follows passion. Whereas, stressing yourself out will end you up in a grave, hospital, mamas arms..

So…? Surf that wave, keep practicing, every time you fall down, get back up. Learn to flow with the waves.. Eventually you will get to where you want to be, but it will happen on the Oceans time. The Ocean decides… All you can do is get really good at surfing.¬†6dd5485b85794d5b83d746dba0942eb9